The next 3 months.

The next 3 months are going to be insanely busy.....but very blessed! They are packed full of good things.

The schedule and to do list is a bit overwhelming though.

We have our 6 year wedding anniversary and my MIL birthday next week along with doctor appointments and trying to get more done on all our many DIY projects we have taken on for the new house. Mason has finished our farm table, but has two benches left to build and stain. Then both boys birthday's are around the corner including party planning/hosting, followed shortly by Mason's birthday, baby showers, coordinating maternity pics, and baby D's visits with biomom and other appointments thrown in there. All the while the unknown with baby D's case looming over head. Then there's the minor detail of packing everything up again and moving to our new house. Then unpacking. All this is between now and August 31st. 

Along with endless daily chores and trying to prepare for miss Lyla's arrival which is approaching so quickly it seems. I am currently sewing her crib skirt, matching ruffled pillow, along with painting an antique vanity and window bench for her room....the window seat also needs the top cushion recovered in new fabric. Though I'm getting some stuff done I have this overwhelming need to 'nest' and I can't since we are moving. Therefore I feel so unprepared. I will keep reminding myself all newborns really need is their mommy, diapers, milk, a place to sleep, and few clothes to wear. The rest can wait if its not done in time!

I think come October with Lyla's arrival I may sigh a breath of relief. Just to have all this done. Of course then comes the holidays. Though I'm sure having a newborn, 13 month old, and a newly 4 year old should be no walk in the park. I can't wait to spend the remainder of the year snuggling all my babies (in a very sleep deprived state) in our new home. Just the thought of Lyla being here and all that is to come makes my heart smile.....plus knowing that we will not have to move homes again for a very long time--if ever-- is wonderful.

I can see Gods timing in everything though. I have to rest in knowing that He orchestrates every detail of my life...even those parts that cause me fear when I can not see what is ahead. 

Therefore, I hope to savor each of these dates, milestones, and life changes that are coming up because I know each one is so very special. My first born is about to turn four already and baby D will be one shortly after. I can see so clearly lately how life is flying by. I've already cried twice in the past two weeks when thinking about our kids growing up and moving out of our home lol blame it on pregnancy hormones, but seriously! When I pray over our kids each night I ask for the patience and guidance to enjoy each day as it is. Yes, some days seem so long and little ones with all their needs drive me crazy sometimes, but this a time I'll never get back with each of them....including Lyla all snug in my belly. Praying to not get too caught up in all there is to do and take it one day at a time. Though it's a busy busy season in our lives...this is one of the most blessed times and I don't want to forget that.

Oh, here is a pic of one of my way too many DIY projects I have going...almost complete now! I sewed a crib skirt for her crib...I cheated though I bought a twin size bed skirt and just cut, tweaked, and sewed here and there to make it fit her crib. Then I had enough left over to make a matching ruffled pillow! I chose to do the extra work bc it was much cheaper than buying a ruffled crib skirt already made (which on a limited budget you cut corners anyway you can:) Feels good to have something else done though! Here's a sneak peak of one edge when I tried it on during the sewing process...love the final result though!!

 

 

 

Also, Breyton and I had fun making some cardboard cut outs for the boys double birthday party coming up! I am doing a much more minimal birthday party this year, so he is enjoying helping make his decorations for the dinosaur theme! With soon to be 3 kids birthdays to plan a year I'm glad to be keeping it more low key, but still awesome for the kiddos of course. Can't wait to celebrate them and their special days....and of course share pics of how cute they are gonna be in their dino shirts!

House progress: Brick and tile.

I know several people have been asking where we are at with the house so here's a short progress update: Brick and tile are complete! This is our brick color obviously, but our trim and garage doors will be a different color later on when they paint them...therefore the final appearance will look different still.

Below is the back porch... My front and back porch are probably one of the things I'm most excited about! I love porches.

View from other side of the back.

And a pic of the tile done in kitchen...its covered in a layer of dust and dirt thought currently..the tile is a light off white color with some more beige toned texturing on it.

That is all folks! Not even sure what the next step is but they have our doors and trim in the garage...so probably those or cabinets or possibly painting is next lol.

Pregnancy tracker: Week 27

This week made up for my lack of pictures during week 26!

B feeling Lyla moving around:)

B and I comparing tummies:)

Size of baby: rutabaga..I actually have no idea what that is!

Total Weight gain: Despite having a stomach bug I managed to gain about 1-1.5lbs 

Maternity Clothes: This week some of my regular clothes(like denim/khaki shorts) are feeling to snug on my belly even when unzipped lol. Lyla sits very very low, so I'm wearing a lot of casual skirts and dresses for comfort lately!

Stretch marks: no

Sleep: I hope my severe lack of sleep this pregnancy produces an opposite affect in Lyla. I hope she loooves to sleep:)

Food cravings: Caught a stomach bug at the beginning of this week and it was miserable! I couldn't eat anything for a whole day which is a long time when preggo;) Glad to have my appetite back!! Fruit, anything potato, cheese/crackers, cereal are my go to snacks.

Symptoms: The back ache is beginning..and I've noticed more strain in my belly when trying to carry baby D around. He's almost walking so hopefully he can help me out there some!

Best moment this week: Watching our new home really start to come together! Getting so close! Also, I had the lovely glucose test this week... And scored a 74, therefore I passed with flying colors. Glad to have passed, so I have one less thing to worry about!

Gender: Girl

Movement: Just like her brother this lil girl seems to prefer to stay head down. I can easily tell she is staying that way bc her feet are mostly kicking up top..plus she has the hiccups daily and they say you feel their hiccups by where their head is obviously. Her hiccups are always felt super super low! 

What I miss: Miss laying on my stomach some, but for the most part nothing really!

What I'm looking forward to: I'm looking forward to going out for our wedding anniversary!:)

Pregnancy tracker: Week 26

Forgot to take a chalkboard picture this week again. I at least have one pic from 26 weeks!

Size of baby: Head of lettuce...she is about 14 inches long now!

Total Weight gain: 14.5 lbs 

Maternity Clothes: sometimes!

Stretch marks: no

Sleep: I average about 6 hours a night collectively...suppose I'm pretty used to that now! Better than what ill be getting once miss thing is here I'm sure:)

Food cravings: fruit! Sandwiches, cheese, milk.

Symptoms: I have been having a lot of pressure in the cervix region...sorry if that's TMI. It was rather concerning how bad it seemed to be getting, but now(week27) it seems to be better. I remember this pain and pressure with Breyton- it feels like the baby is just gonna fall out! Anyways, with him I was much further along at least 34weeks I would say. Lyla is already head down and sitting low, so that combined with this being my second time around is hopefully all it is.

Best moment this week: seeing her on ultrasound one last time....mostly her back side lol, but just to see she is growing and healthy! 

Gender: Confirmed that she is definitely a girl for the 3rd time at our 3d ultrasound:)

Movement: lots of movement! The ultrasound showed she was in the heads down facing my spine position...which is exactly what you want for birth(not so great for face pictures lol)..anyways I can feel plenty of feet, knees, elbows, and hands towards the middle and top of my stomach.

What I miss: We enjoyed some time at the lake with friends this past week and I had to chill in the boat the whole time except for a little swimming...which is not bad, but did miss out on all the cliff jumping, tubing, etc! Plenty of summers for that though:)

What I'm looking forward to: Seeing my beautiful little girls face -for real- for the first time. I'm starting to spend more and more time daydreaming about what she will look like and holding her for the first time! 

Pregnancy tracker: Week 25

A comparison pic below-this is me 25 weeks with Breyton:

Size of baby: head of cauliflower 

Total Weight gain: This week we swam a lot and I didn't eat Cheesecake factory 3 times, so my weight gain stayed even pretty much from last week:) 13.5-14lbs total. 

Maternity Clothes: sometimes..I'm needing them more and more lol, but I'm too cheap to buy any so I make due with stretchy regular clothes;)

Stretch marks: no

Sleep: Pretty much the same..waking up to pee at least twice a night!

Food cravings: any mexican food, fruit, and milk.

Symptoms: Just stretching and growing..Lyla is making herself known!

Best moment this week: Finding out our closing date on our house moved back up to August 30th! Just 7 more weeks and we are so ready!

Gender: Girl

Movement: plenty of movement..I feel a lot of her rolling around to change positions or stretch instead of mostly all just kicks and jabs.

What I miss: nothing really...

What I'm looking forward to: I'm always torn because I love being pregnant, so I want to keep her in there and enjoy these moments...on the other hand though I can't wait to meet her face to face for the first time. I'm just so in love with her already and I look forward to sooo much. ....I'm sure by October ill be thinking ok just come out now already though haha!!!

Oh and I bought the cutest antique vanity for her room...super cheap on Craigslist of course. I'm so excited about all the decor for her room--adorable and on a budget:) I loved playing makeup at a vanity I had growing up, so I can't wait to see her sitting here doing the same.

A roller coaster ride of the heart...

Talking about emotions of course...this whole foster parent/adoption process is undoubtedly a roller coaster ride that I have no control over. 

A week ago I had no news.

A few days ago I received news that made things suddenly appear very good for us in baby D's case. I actually really thought things may have taken a turn and this case may be wrapping up a little quicker than I had been forseeing......

Then just like that today I receive an email that sends us crashing back down the hill of the unknown. The one thing that could most definitely prolong and possibly turn this case around is now appearing to happen. 

Though we are surprised by this news I know God is not. 

So I pray He can steady's our hearts as we continue to love and care for our son....while a women he does not even know and a broken system get to have our family and 5 children's lives(along with other foster families) in complete limbo as they please.

 I had to struggle to hold back tears as I endured today's visit. As baby D looked on at me across the room screaming and tears rolling down his face wondering why I wouldn't just come hold him. When I could finally come take him the relief on both our faces is only a glimpse into what is at stake here.

I say this not to discourage others from similar paths, but to hopefully one day show the glory God will bring from all this brokenness. I will never doubt that God has placed D with us and I fully trust in the sovereignty of His plan...however no where in Gods word are we promised to be spared from trials and suffering. Thats the part that makes our frail hearts so scared. I believe God is very close at hand in the care of these orphaned children and if we allow He can use us to be his hands and feet in this situation. Oh, that we may be able to keep our eyes focused on the eternal picture when surrounded by so much hurt.

In church on Sunday I found my self surrounded by Gods presence as we sang 'Oh, how He loves us'. Lost in the thought of how much God truly loves me. Truly loves baby D.  Dwelling on the thought that he will surely protect us from all this...then all the sudden as I sang those words I thought of D's bio mom. 

Those words were meant for her to.

 God does not love her any less than he loves me and no matter what she chooses to do he is a Father who is grieving over his lost child and wants to welcome her into his arms. May I keep that in mind as our lives(whether by choice or not) our intertwined with hers... and who she is and who she can become affects my daily life. Every day.

Read this quote the other day and in a simple sentence explains so many emotions:

Children born to another woman call me "Mom". 

The depth of that tragedy and the magnitude of that privilege are not lost on me.

- Jody Landers

Pregnancy tracker: week 24

Breyton loves to come pat "Momma's big ol belly" as he calls it. Then he is always trying to stick out his tummy to make it look big like mine lol. He is excited about his sisters arrival though! He tries to convince me to buy things when we are at a store with the excuse, "It's for Lyla!"...Haha nice try:)

This is the week of pregnancy that my niece was born...so I have this mental image of her perfectly formed, but tiny body in my head...and it seems crazy to think about Lyla in there. We are all so blessed that my niece is doing great and just as healthy as can be now at 2.5 yrs old! I will not take for granted feeling Lyla and carrying her for these remaining months.

Size of baby: cantaloupe 

Total Weight gain: So I gained the most I have in a week yet lol..put on 2 almost 3lbs this week. Leaving me with a total of 13.5-14 lbs.

Maternity Clothes: sometimes

Stretch marks: no

Sleep: Hit and miss! Sometimes baby D sleeps through the night, but I still have to wake up to pee of course. Then one night this week D had some new teeth coming through and was up several times..so ya never know!

Food cravings: This was my birthday week..and I may have been spoiled by eating at the Cheesecake Factory 3 times! So yummy. I could probably eat there everyday! Though i better not bc that probably explains the extra weight gain:) Other than that my cravings were the usual fruit, milk, and cereal.

Symptoms: The usual..but this week I had a several bouts of cramping. My whole abdomen area would just ache. I don't think it was Braxton hicks bc it was a constant dull thing not a come and go. Anyways been trying to not lift the boys as much....otherwise I'm feeling fine!

Best moment this week: Her movements are getting really big just to watch them from the outside..so it is so fun to watch her roll around. The few moments I get to sit each day I usually spend watching her move if I can!

Gender: Girl

Movement: Baby girl had her first round of hiccups that I could feel the first of this week. Then she has had them sometimes multiple times a day since. Breyton always had them often in the womb and as a newborn. Must be hereditary haha:)

What I miss: nothing really this week!

What I'm looking forward to: We have a 3d/4d ultrasound coming up July 12th, so I'm excited to see how Lyla has grown! I debated whether or not to have one done, but I'm getting it done at Moore/Norman tech and the cost is only $20...so I figured it was worth that!